Sunday

I woke up before 6:00 after three fitful hours of sleep.  When my eyes opened and I was in the hospital, I knew yesterday wasn't a dream.  I was nauseous beyond belief.  Combination of stress and barely eating.  So I ask the nurse for a Sprite & crackers.  Ate two crackers and a sip of Sprite and then went and threw it up and dry heaved for a good two minutes.  This caused Billy Jo concern and she got the nurses and told them she wanted me checked out in the ER.  I felt in was unnecessary but this is not the time to argue over something so little.  So I went.  They gave me a Zofran and a Xanax and let me sit in the room alone for 45 minutes.  Then they released me. I get back upstairs and what do you know? She was better today. Up and moving around. Lots of visitors. Seemed more alive than since Wednesday. She's wiped out tired now, but it was a good morning/afternoon compared to the last 2 or 3.  Unfortunately she's slipped back to the Friday/Saturday mode of pain and slipping in and out of unconsciousness.

They have stopped some of the harsher meds that try to get her to poop - if they haven't worked for a week, they won't now, and only add to the pain and discomfort she is feeling. They've upped the dosage of the fentanyl patch today, as well as the dilaudid dosage.

Still no poop :(

Had several lengthy talks with friends that visited today.  I can't begin to thank everyone enough for your concern.  Everyone wants to know what they can do for me/us... I really cannot think of anything.  I usually don't know the day of the week, the time, anything lately.  Please know that when I need help for something, I will ask.  I just don't know what that something is at this time.

I have got to find a way to sleep tonight.  Have to.  I am wearing down.