A Brighter Day
Billy Jo is doing much better compared to yesterday. Sure, she's spent a lot of time in bed, and sure, she's only eaten a few spoonfuls of food, but she's alert. She's gone since 5:30am without any dilaudid, so that's promising. Her leg swelling is still down as well. The hospice nurse came this morning and suggested a few things to help with the nausea and uneasy stomach.
Since she was doing better, and Lena had offered to come over and visit with her, I decided to take a short bike ride. It was almost two weeks since my last one, and to be honest, I needed it. I just didn't know if I wanted it to be a thinking ride or a 'shut off brain, murder legs' ride. I was thinking I'd do a thinking ride, because I'm still somewhat under the weather and breathing is necessary to remain upright and moving forward while on a bicycle.
I stopped several times to take a few pics (another indicator it wasn't a leg murdering ride) of the changing leaves, which improved my mood. Saying that seems strange, since I'm not really in a bad or down mood...just one of acceptance that everything is out of our hands now. Defense mechanism? Perhaps. But a better fitting one for me than denial.
Today's ride also marked my first crash of 2012. I turned around to head back at a wide area in the trail and cut the turn radius too close and on loose gravel, to boot. It happened so quick I didn't get the chance to break my fall (and therefore, my hand again). No damage to the bike or the new phone, and just a bit of road rash on my hip. The ride back was directly into the wind most of the way, which sucked, but it was all in all a nice 11 mile ride, which turned out to be neither a thinker or a leg-killer... simply 45 minutes on my bike. Felt good.
After that I decided to drive into work and fill a box up with a bunch of stuff I can work on from home. It was good to see everyone at work and I'm forever thankful they've been doing everything they can to help so I can be where I need to - at home with Billy Jo.