Day One

It's already after 10:00 so I'll try to make this quick.

I slept six hours. SLEPT. It was weird to feel what sleep was supposed to do all along, but hadn't in months.

I got up and kept busy throughout the day. More going through things, started a project I'll share with you when completed, went to the funeral home for final adjustments, bringing the dress and flip-flops, etc.

Friends and family came over tonight and they went through and took a lot more of Billy Jo's stuff. It makes me happy that I can do this - anything they want to remember her by is awesome, and removes it from the house, which can cause unwanted triggers in the future. She made me promise I wouldn't "shrine" the house and leave it untouched. I'm making sure she can see I am living up to that promise.

One quick story. The final resting place for Billy Jo I promised in today's blog will have to wait for tomorrow - I need to fully explain it and am too tired right now.

What I'm not too tired to tell you is that in this post I mentioned telling Billy Jo on Friday night about our friend needing her help because her nephew was suffering and hanging on way longer than he should have. What I failed to mention though was that when I said his name to her, I saw her left eye move under the lid. That was the first sign of anything out of her in days.

Just over 24 hours after Billy Jo passed away, he joined her.

Now, I am still battling myself with organized religion in general, but I believe in "something" spirit-wise. Today only gave me more hope. I had five short cries today, yet none after hearing this news. I know there's more coming, but that news calmed me for the rest of the day. That sounds really shitty to say, especially about an 11-year old boy passing away, but he suffered so much and was in the same predicament as Billy Jo - not wanting to let go. His passing and no longer being in pain calmed me as much as knowing Billy Jo was the same. I want to think her spirit reached out to him and told him it was ok.

...

Here is the official link to the funeral home details. The obituary will also be in the Chicago Sun-Times and the Joliet Herald tomorrow.

Also, for those of you coming to the wake, to my surprise, you will be meeting Wrigley. I asked if she could visit for 30 minutes or so and was told she was welcome for the whole time. As long as she's a good girl she'll be there from 2-9. I think she needs it. She loves people and she's going to be on "oh boy! new friends!" overload. She also needs to "see" Billy Jo one last time. For all her faithful unquestionable love for Billy Jo, she deserves it.